Impatience (is it vacation time yet?!)

When I was little, I assumed I was an impatient person because I always seemed to be waiting for something. Waiting for Christmas, birthdays, a sibling to come home, the end of the school year, grandparents to visit. And time seemed to move so slowly!

It probably wasn’t just me. When you’re young and at the mercy of adults for things to happen, there is a lot of waiting in your daily life.

I’m thinking about waiting right now, as I watch every minute tick by until I leave tomorrow for a vacation to England and Scotland. I’ve already discussed my love of travel, and it has been since our honeymoon 2 years ago that my husband and I have had a long vacation-adventure together. I Can’t Wait!

Does thinking about the thing that is driving us mad make it more bearable?

Probably not. 

Nevertheless, I’m delving into impatience head first as I sit here confronting it.

I had always assumed that when I “grew up,” I wouldn’t have to wait much anymore. If I wanted something, I could just drive out to get it. If I wanted to visit a friend, I could go.

But in the last few years, I’ve carried this heavy feeling like I’ve been “waiting” for my life to begin. As soon as I graduated university, it would happen. As soon as I got back from a year abroad teaching English, surely it would begin. As soon as I finished my Master’s degree, got married, got a job, moved into a house–life could start!

This waiting-for-life phenomenon seems to go hand-in-hand with constantly feeling busy and overwhelmed. We tend to think that we will be free to start living once things go back to “normal.”

But while we wait for life to start–after something is finished, or things calm down–we could be missing what’s happening around us. I’m starting to think that what feels like chaos actually is normal. Having many projects on the go, multiple responsibilities, facing unforeseen events–that’s normal.

This is what “being present” is all about. Life is not just around the corner. It’s here, right now. This is it.

So we have a choice. Live passively, or actively. Do we just wait for things to happen and hope they work out the way we want? Or do we write our own story, taking charge of our experience in this world?

Easier said than done, but sometimes just acknowledging the choice helps us get moving in the right direction.

Of course, I’m still watching the clock until I’m on my way!

While I’m away, my blog might turn into a bit of a (spotty) travelogue–don’t expect my normal posts, but I’ll try to send some quick dispatches from England and Scotland! Yay vacation!

Waiting in an airport... that will be me again tomorrow!

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15 responses to “Impatience (is it vacation time yet?!)

  1. Pingback: Big Changes! « the self-styled life·

  2. So we have a choice. Live passively, or actively. Do we just wait for things to happen and hope they work out the way we want? Or do we write our own story, taking charge of our experience in this world? <———–I LOVE this line because it is so true! I often do the former and not the latter myself! 😦

    I notice that I tend to be passive, waiting for something to happen to me in life. I also assume that when those things happen, life will be better. So like you pointed out, I used to think that life would get better (or even start) when I finish university, when I get married, when I buy a house etc etc…..but the more I keep waiting, the more life passes me by……So, I'm trying to be more proactive, but it is definitely a (neverending) struggle! (It's another thing I still can't quite check off my "to do" list!) …….Great post as always! 🙂

    Have a great vacation! No worries about t doing regular posts, your readers will still be here when you return! 😉

    • Thanks for your comment. We seem to be in the same boat!

      Haha, I certainly hope my readers are still around! I got back a few days ago and have missed writing a lot. I had been hoping I’d be able to post while I was away but it just wasn’t working out! Now it’s catch up time 🙂

  3. Patience was never really my strong suit. >.< I've noticed that for some things my time frame for exercising has shorted, if that's possible. This is especially true when it comes to waiting for good things to happen.
    Thanks for the reminder that I still have some tweaking to do.

  4. I can really relate to your thought that ‘what feels like chaos actually is normal’ right now. Just as things are on the downward slope with the trial, we find out my husband has leukemia and are already starting his treatment. The roller coaster of life continues…

    I wish you and your family a wonderful vacation!

    • Hi Sara! I’m so sorry to hear about your husband. Unbelievable–you think it’s time for a break and then that. I’m so sorry–I’ll be thinking about you guys!
      Thanks for your wishes–we did have a great time!

  5. You have such a knack of hitting cords in my life. I was always impatient for the big ‘stuff’ to happen, until I realized that it’s the little stuff, the every day gems that make a life fulfilled. I feel more fulfilled now, that I capture the moments…and alas, the huge events do come! Travel safe, can’t wait for the travelogue!

  6. Summer II is upon me and now I’m already looking towards fall. New course, new units, new syllabus.

    Safe travel!! I will look for your travel updates. Have a wonderful time. I’ve never been to Scotland.

  7. Nicely put. And I agree, no matter how old are we, we always tend to wait for something.. it never ends.. The earlier we realize that it is normal, the better… And ya, wishing you a happy & safe journey.. Have a great time 🙂

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